Do you have a problem that needs fixin’…?
You gotta remember me, the ship’s cat, I tried to escape from my ship back to England. Do you remember how I had a terrible time bein’ kidnapped? When I was whisked away in the middle of the night, when the storm was all thunder an’ lightening with windows rattling, an’ people outside screamin’, when I was stolen from my mom in England an’ smuggled to that terrible ship in Mexico. Now I’m on the run, I’ve got to know loads of those Mexican harbour an’ dustbin cats.
Me an’ my new Mexican friends, we spotted one of those gaps in the market, now we’re agony angels sorting cat’s everyday problems an’ poor owners who have no one to turn to. Like I already told you, it wasn’t easy bein’ a ship’s cat, the food was crap, I don’t like catchin’ ship’s vermin an’ I don’t get paid no wages.
I want to get back to England to find my mom, an’ bein’ a cat’s angel is the best way to do it…
My Nellie Cat website got relaunched, we got new character makeovers an’ lots more feline problems that we’ve sorted. An’ the excitin’ news is we got commercial cat-food sponsors comin’ who’ll shake things up on my ship, they said they’d make me captain.
Our feline problem solvin’ won lots of awards an’ we got some great reviews, here’s some of the amazing reviews we got from really famous people…
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ ‘I didn’t like cats, now I do’ – General George Armstrong Custer
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ ‘Those poor ship’s cats, those poor poor ship’s cats’ – Greta Thunburg
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ ‘Oh, that Nellie Cat, she’s my hero’ – Nibbles from Norwich
⭐️ ‘Don’t you believe a word this cat’s saying now, she spins stories like a drunken trooper’ – The ship’s captain.
Yup! Not many cats get reviews like this. There’s lots more tearful cat stories to read an’ you might end up blurtin’ – but remember, we cats, we make you laugh an’ then we make you cry.
If you’re a cat an’ you got problems, then me an’ my Mexican friends are the cats to talk to. If you’re an owner at your wits end, then us cats can fix it. There’s me an’ Wosita, Herminia an’ our friendly veterinary Mildred, we’re here to be there just for you.
Now you’re here on my new website you can follow me, you can learn what happened when I got kidnapped an’ you’ll get to hear all the cat gossip an’ emotional stuff that keeps us cats goin’. Or you can just browse, even at your leisure, none of it will cost you, we’re not like those Russian internet cats or those cats from Nigeria.
You can read lots of cat’s an’ owner’s problems we’ve already fixed here. They’re amazing, we’ve won awards an’ got medals, I’ve even been asked to be in a movie. I’m gonna get me a Queen’s honour someday soon – Dame Nellie Cat. Does it sound good? An’ when we’ve made enough dosh I can make my way to England to find my mom. Please help me!
If you’ve got a sticky feline problem that needs fixing, just you write in to Nellie Cat.
Click the button an’ Like my Facebook page, Mr Zuckerburg’s a friend of mine an’ is desperate for me to find my mom!
If you wanna receive regular Ship’s Cat Feline Agony Angel blogs like this, genuine feline problems every one, then click the Follow Nellie button thing down there on the bottom left. It’s all free, you don’t have to sign up to WordPress, just register with your email address.
Like an’ share my Facebook Page, you’ll get to hear about more great stuff as things go by. We seriously need the social media traffic.
No cats were harmed in the production of this post. Protect the environment – it’s the only one we got. An’ don’t put those electronic cat-scarers in your garden.
My name is Dave, if you would like to support my hard work in creating & managing the Ship’s Cat website, you can do so by clicking the above link to buy me a coffee. Mine’s a cowboy-style Guatemalan…