Tell Nellie The Cat Your Feline Problems…
It all happens on this page folks. Some of this stuff isn’t for the feint hearted and might even set your pulses racing. Feel free to add your opinions but just remember… too much gossip killed the cat…
“Over the other side there’ll be sunshine and Kitekat and that really nice Whiskers food too. There’ll be nice lady cats with gentleman cats who’ll take care of you and show you what to do. It could be a new life for you on the other side, then you can show that bastard bully cat that you showed him a thing or two.“
“First, let me tell ya you gotta be there for your sister Daisy. My sisters in England weren’t bothered one bit about me when I got kidnapped so you gotta realise how painful kidnapping can be. Does Daisy ever talk to you? Do you have the kinda relationship that family siblings should always have?”
“You could try one of those electronic cat deterrent devices which emit ultrasonic sound waves that are supposed to stop us Kitties dead in our tracks but I’ve never yet heard any cat say they notice any noise that drives us insane.”
“Oh dear! Pebbles and Petunia really did go through it didn’t they. Have they been affected by the breakdown in the relationship between you and your husband? Kitties are very sensitive to these things you know.”
“As for Barney he could end up piggy-in-the-middle. You’re gonna have to make it up to him now that you’ve got him into trouble. How about plenty of kitty treats with lots of friendly attention?”
“In the meantime ain’t there a sheepdog around someplace who can just help you out? I mean, they’re miserable old gits sometimes but some of em ain’t too bad. Promise the dog something nice, dogs are suckers for stuff like that or you could even learn to do that sheepdog whistle.”
“It’s not unusual for veterinaries to do this you know, it’s a sneaky way of telling you that your kitty has only so long to live but at least you have time to prepare.”
Did you know I’ve even got my very own Facebook Page? If you click my link then Like and Share My Page, more people will know about how I was kidnapped then forced to become a Ship’s Cat against my will. I’ve got rights too you know.
Also, if you click that WordPress Follow button down there on the left you’ll automatically get updates whenever things go wrong on this ship.
You’ve gotta help me right?